5 April 2004
GangstaLand set to open near Orlando
More T-shirt shops expected on International Drive
CELEBRATION, Fla. -- Another theme park—the first of its kind to open
anywhere in the world—is scheduled to open September 13 just south of Orlando.
The opening date will fall on the
anniversary of the murder of Tupac Shakur, the rap singer who was gunned down in Las
Vegas in 1996.
Brandon Fellsmere, a Travel Fox reporter who has no next of kin for whom
he is responsible, was invited to a special preview of the park. During
the tour,
Mr. Slam-Bam Thudd, President of GangstaParks, LLP, described a few of the parks attractions.
Among them shown were the "Extortion Contortion" (a Cadillac trunk escape ride),
the "Stereo Bass Blast" (a test of inner eardrum sustainability), and "Shootinanny,"
which is described in company literature as "a rollicking fun stage show
of hip-hop and gunfire."
All of these attractions surround the main feature and what
will be the
hallmark of GangstaLand: A Mark Spitz designed, multiple-channel water slide
interwoven among
28 Greg Louganis signature series
springboards. Called "Dive By Chuting," this attraction is expected to
be able to turn 5400 guests per hour.
Following the tour,
Mr. Thudd pointed to the "Low Pants and Implants" day spa on an
adjoining property where guests could, according to him, "relax and
refresh with a bitch-slap treatment after an enjoyable day of mayhem and
disorderly conduct."
Mr. Thudd said, "GangstaParks sees itself as a company that is in-tune with current
cultural trends
upon which it intends to capitalize." And company
backers have lofty plans to do just that.
If successful, GangstaParks expects to develop similar theme parks
near Carmel, Calif., Gross Point, Mich., Westport, Conn., Naples, Fla.,
and Baghdad, Iraq.
Other unique features of this theme park are the use of tattoos (a small
"GL" logo just behind the left ear) instead of the issuance of traditional
admission passes
and the Bad Mutha gift shop, where guests will be able to purchase T-shirts with the slogan, "My
f***ing boyz
went ta f***ing GangstaLand and all they
f***ing done brung me waz
this f***ing shirt."
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